Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Poems, and Relationship Advice.

Did someone say cream cheese?

 

Leftovers and a year's supply of cream cheese are the only things in your fridge? Are you okay?

 

During the work week, I only eat two meals a day. Cream cheese breakfast sandwiches and then some sort of mixed rice and meat dish I cook on Sundays and reheat over the following week.

What you didn't see was the Dave's Killer bread hamburger buns I keep in the freezer for the breakfast sandwiches. I used to keep a more fully stocked fridge but since it's me living alone I only get stuff that won't spoil or I will eat within a week. Otherwise it just gets tossed, which is wasteful.

I don't have the time or energy to cook meals from scratch every day. I also don't like eating out as it makes it harder to track exactly what you are getting in caloric intake.

 

Dude, I hear that. With it just being me in the house the fridge is way more empty than it used to be.

 

I would say that Dave's Killer bread is a bit of an acquired taste. To me it is less processed compared to the typical sliced bread/burger buns in the store. Just make sure you freeze it as it will get moldy quick due to having less preservatives.

If I want good bread, I will usually get it from a bakery. We have very good bread with sourdough in particular from various artisanal bakeries in the area.

I just can't eat the bleached wheat ultra processed stuff anymore. It causes all kinds of stomach issues for me.

 

Is it different than Spain too?

I have one Spanish language story, it's kind of long, but I'll try to keep it short.

I was riding an oil tanker from Newport News, VA to Ponce, Puerto Rico. Another guy riding with me is a beer drinker, like me. We couldn't smuggle enough beer onboard so we brought a bunch of Crown.

When we got to Ponce and got a rental dropped off on the pier, the first place we stopped was a convenience store. The guy I was travelling with had a schtick, dumb country boy. We get to the convivence store and he goes in loudly and asks the clerk, 'where's the beer, we want some beer?"

I found out that if you assume the people speak English and you kind of verbally assault them, they will shut down.

The clerk averts his gaze and says, "no Englase(sp?)"

I go back 35 years to my high school Spanish and ask, tiene cerveza aqui?

He says, beer?, no that's across the street. Perfect English.

I asked about ice, heilo. Apparently it's pronounced yellow. He helped me with that. And said si, over there.
You just have to try.

 

Smoked salmon for the first time on my smoker last weekend. Was pretty good. Tonight is steelhead at grill temps. Amazing!

 

Brazil is like a totally different spanish...










(It's Portuguese)

 

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DIcnU6Kvp09/?igsh=eDdxOG9lN2pxb2Zt

 

Cream cheese is disgusting.

 

Oof. My buddy is roasting me for having a Ferd.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DIB8Bu8JFPf/?igsh=YzZneHFreHo3c25p

 

Correct. I love listening to the different languages when I travel. Portuguese is probably my favorite…this perfect blend of spanish and french.

 

This is incorrect. Simple recipe, block of cream cheese, crab meat, pour some cocktail sauce on top. Serve with crackers.

 

You lost me at cocktail sauce. That's just expensive and cold ketchup, which makes it even worse than regular ketchup.

 

Butter. Maybe some homemade strawberry or raspberry jam.

Wrong. Leave the sea spiders in the sea. Plus I have a shellfish allergy anyways.

 

I go dayshift tomorrow. My alarm goes off at 4:45 AM so I can get to work between 5:30-5:45.

If I went to sleep right now I can only get 7.5h of sleep.

Trouble is... I am not at all tired.

 

I know the feeling.

 

Brazil is probably different because that's Portuguese.

 

About the last 6 months I've struggled to flip my sleep schedule. Basically, since I hit 40.

Don't jinx me with that nonsense!

 

https://youtu.be/Z0YIJQ1jgEI?si=Nlw_KTYXhxEMvTIt

 

Did a mug of hot milk with some honey.

Need to get new honey.